I so needed to read this today. I’d never heard of emotional incest but this resonates. I’m 45 and still breaking up with my mother. Guilt on the one hand and frustration on the other. She’s furious at me for having found a man I’m happy with, and for being content and stable for the first time in my life. She’s withdrawing her emotional support, undercutting my belief in unconditional love. (OTOH maybe that’s a good thing to learn: I am the only person who can provide that kind of love for myself.)