Thanks for this wise comparison. Somehow it takes a bit of the sting out of the process and puts this tricky relationship where it belongs: as just another of the paths we have to navigate as writers. I think the author/agent dynamic gets so built up, becomes so mythical, that approaching it for the first time feels like climbing Everest. It doesn’t matter how far up the mountain I get; if I don’t summit, it’s all for naught. And now I have to start all over again courting another agent.

But really, finding an agent is part of the writing process. It’s not mythical, any more than sitting down with a pen or a laptop. Like with dating, there are fun parts and tedious parts, and getting published requires both. At least I hope that’s what you’re saying; I haven’t found an agent yet but I’ll check back in when I do!